Q. This has been the "holiday from hell" for me as I have been working on myself for years trying to find out what was "wrong" with me. Well, I was fortunate to have a new, very good friend in my company this week that minored in psychology in college and bestowed the patience and love of not just a genuine friend, but also comes from a place of spiritual faith.

Ok. I have spent the last ten years going through unbelievable traumas, the last being just this past August being diagnosed with MS. My question is to you...

I have read a lot on the internet and the "stress" factors that this disorder (BPD) that I know I have, initiate in a person's physical abilities. In other words, is it at all possible that this diagnosis of MS is related to the disorder? I had the best neurologist I could have had...teaches at Stanford. My spinal came back negative, but I have a history of stress/trauma related physical and mental problems over the last 20 years, i.e.: car accidents, house fires, cancer and the first MS indicator in 1981-optic neuritis.

I respect the brain is a magnificent computer and the input programming, conscious or unconscious, is what is projected. Now that I am aware fully that I am a classic, textbook serious BPD case...the biggest question I have is there a link to the personality disorder and the physical problems I have had these past two years...all indicating from specialists, MS?

One of the main reasons that this is a specific question in my mind is, I experienced consistent, small quantity, long term carbon monoxide exposure from 1994 to 1996 and at OHSU went through extensive testing to determine the damage the gas had done to me. My cognitive impairment being the most damaged. Now, my neurologist suggested that the MS, not known of at that time, was the strongest possible reason for a majority of the results they found. It was also suggested the toxin had a triggering effect on the MS and bringing me out of remission.

Perhaps you can answer the question for me. It haunts me as I want to fix me and am fully aware that it will take perhaps as long to fix as I have already searched...decades now.

The first step is finding a therapist that specializes in this disorder. I am on medications that help control the depression and anxiety attacks. Prozac being the mainstay of my coping with life all these years. Your response would be so appreciated and are we not blessed with the fact we can ask these questions and get answers on the internet.

A. If you have MS, there is a limited amount of things we can do clinically. If on the other hand, you have BPD or MS and BPD, there is a lot we can do for the BPD. Prozac is as good as any if you are on enough (80 mg or more/day).

Treat the BPD aggressively. I have had three patients with optic neuritis and BPD, but they never developed MS. BPD is also associated with cognitive difficulties. So, it is possible you have just BPD, and if it is treated right, many of your problems could resolve. The carbon monoxide, if it is a problem, is not reversible. You should always treat the things that are fixable.