Malignant Self Love:  Narcissism Revisited

Review by Author Dr. Sam Vaknin

 

�Malignant Self Love� was written under extreme conditions of duress. It was composed in jail as I was trying to understand what had hit me. My nine year old marriage dissolved, my finances were in a shocking condition, my family estranged, my reputation ruined, my personal freedom severely curtailed. Slowly, the realization that it was all my fault, that I was sick and needed help penetrated the decades old defenses that I erected around me. This book is the documentation of a road of self discovery. It was a painful process, which led to nowhere. I am no different � and no healthier � today than when I wrote this book. My disorder is here to stay, the prognosis is poor and alarming. The book is divided to three parts: 

�Malignant Self Love � Narcissism Revisited� is the core text. The narcissist is an actor enacting a monodrama, yet forced to remain behind the scenes. The scenes take center stage, instead. The Narcissist does not cater at all to his own needs. Contrary to his reputation, the Narcissist does not "love" himself in any true sense of this loaded word. He feeds off other people, who hurl back at him an image that he projects to them. This is their sole function in his world: to reflect, to admire, to applaud, to detest - in a word, to assure him that he exists.

Otherwise, they have no right to tax his time, energy, or emotions - so he feels. The Narcissist's ego is weak and lacks clear borders. Many of the ego functions are projected. The Superego is sadistic and punishing. The Id is unrestrained. Primary objects in the Narcissist's childhood were badly idealised and internalised. His object relations are distraught and destroyed.

The main body of research about Narcissism is surveyed.

"Malignant Self Love - Narcissism Re-Visited" offers a detailed, first hand account of what it is like to have a Narcissistic Personality Disorder. It offers new insights and an organised methodological framework using a new psychodynamic language.

Narcissism is a slippery subject: only with great difficulty can it be captured with words. A new vocabulary had to be invented to account for the myriad of facets and appearances - false and true - of this disease. Thus, the first part of this book requires some understanding of the psychoanalytic terminology and is full with my own suggested contributions to it.

�Malignant Self Love - Narcissism Re-visited� contains the following chapters:  

Introduction: The Soul of a Narcissist - the State of the Art
Chapter One: Being Special
Chapter Two: Uniqueness and Intimacy
Chapter Three: The Workings of a Narcissist - a Phenomenology
Chapter Four: The tortured Self - the Inner World of the narcissist
Chapter Five: The Narcissist and the opposite sex
Chapter Six: The Concept of Narcissistic Supply
Chapter Seven: The Concepts of Narcissistic Accumulation and Narcissistic Regulation
Chapter Eight: The Emotional Involvement Preventive Measures
Chapter Nine: Loss of Control of Grandiosity

The second part of the book is more accessible and less jargon-laden. It comprises almost 60 Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs) regarding Narcissism and personality disorders. The posting �Malignant Self Love � Narcissism Revisited� on the Web has elicited a flood of excited, sad and heart rending responses, mostly from victims of Narcissists but also from people suffering from the NPD. This is a true picture of the resulting correspondence with them. Finally, Narcissism is a phenomenon, which affected society and culture in profound ways. The third part contains appendices that deal with various aspects and manifestations of Narcissism. In a way, it represents philosophical, cultural and societal issues as perceived by a person suffering from NPD (that is I). This is why it is entitled: �The World as Viewed By the Narcissist�. This book is heavy reading. It is not intended to please or to entertain. NPD is a pernicious, vile and tortuous disease, which affects not only the Narcissist. It infects and forever changes people who are in daily contact with the Narcissist. In other words : it is contagious. It is my contention that Narcissism is the mental epidemy of the twentieth century, a plague to be fought by all means.

This book is my contribution to minimizing the damages of this disorder.

Sam Vaknin is the author of "Malignant Self Love - Narcissism Revisited" and "After the Rain - How the West Lost the East".
He is a columnist in "Central Europe Review", United Press International
(UPI) and InternetContent.net and the editor of mental health and Central East Europe categories in The Open Directory, Suite101, Go.com and searcheurope.com.
He is the Economic Advisor to the Government of Macedonia.
His web site: http://samvak.tripod.com