Q. My two foster kids (girl:7 and boy:5) were returned to their biological single-parent mother less than 3 months ago. She has been diagnosed with Bipolar and "Personality disorder not otherwise specified with antisocial, borderline and dependent features". There has been a lot of domestic violence in the past, some against the kids, neglect, and drug abuse. Knowing her a lot better than the person who did the eval, I'd argue that borderline is the primary diagnosis.
Watching the kids cope with their new/old life, I see a lot of things that worry me:
- rapid increase in dissociation and black-white thinking on part of the kids:
- increased aggressivity on part of the kids with each other and the world in general. On the other hand, they seem to focus on each other much more now.:
- the undertones of "I don't want to deal with this", aggressivity in everyday interactions between mother and children, although, if you just look at the surface, mom is doing almost "perfectly" most of what she is supposed to do as mom.:
- the girl getting into screaming rages "I hate you I hate you ..." although she sometimes also searches out mom for physical proximity:
- very conflicting messages from mother to child, e.g. reacting to that "I hate you" with a kiss, and the statement "Now you can't hate me because I kissed you". That was probably the most bewildered look I ever saw on a child's face.:
- the 5-yr old boy leaving the apartment for the yard as often as he can, even if there is no attraction outside:
- I can't see much (if any) positive, encouraging feedback from mother to children:
- the 7-yr old follows a new friend in school around in a way that is very unusually (for us) "dependent". It used to be the other way around.:
And lots of others.My question: am I just seeing BPD being transmitted from parent to child? (at least to the girl) Are there any studies you are aware of that I might be able to consult? Of all people, who would be able to answer this question best? What if anything can anyone do to prevent that?
A. There are a lot of good ideas and concerns on your part, but little in the ways of studies to answer any of your questions. My own experience with BPD is that the illness is chemical, but will worsen or be triggered in a hostile environment. Kind of like eating too much sugar if you have a propensity to type II diabetes. You may get the diabetes (BPD) even if you watch your diet (environment), but a bad diet (environment) will increase the chance of illness for those at risk.
There are no studies that cover what you are looking for that I am aware of.